Friday, September 25, 2015

Rising Strong by Brene Brown: My Top Take far.

I have only just started this book, and am immediately regretting only having the Audible version, because I am dying to highlight and take notes as I listen along in my car.  So, I'll just start with saying that because, it is an amazing book, and couldn't have come into my life at a better time.

I don't want to spoil this book for anyone, because in my opinion, if you've ever failed (aka, everyone reading this), and you think that that's just all there is, that your story is over, you must read this.  Even if you feel stuck, unhappy, and, as Brene Brown calls it, 'the messy middle', then you absolutely must read this.

The Messy Middle...
This past year, I have been trying to run a business amidst other life happenings.  The big one being IVF.  For anyone reading this who has gone through IVF, you know what comes with it.  Lots of doctor appointments, lots of emotions, lots of money, lots of physical changes, poking and prodding.  I can tell you that just ONE of these items as a stressor can take me down for the count.  Let alone all three.  My 'messy middle' reached it's height at the end of our second IVF attempt this past year, when we found out our cycle had failed.  I cried harder than I had in a very long time, and, it surprised me that I had about 10 minutes of sadness and became really, really angry.  I thought to myself 'what a waste!', 'I've given all I can give, and it wasn't enough, what ELSE can we do?!'  Even as I sit thinking back to that time, my eyes well up with tears.  I sat in my house, receiving the news alone, as my husband was away on a military training, and shook with anger.  That was, I believe, my lowest point.  The next few days involved me calling and telling my husband, my family, and a few close friends.  They'd all been praying, and I so desperately wanted to tell them a story of success.  And I just couldn't.  My heart was broken, and theirs were too.  I knew that this was a failure that was out of my control, but that made it even more frustrating to me.  

The Bottom...
As I desperately tried to dive into my business and not think about everything that had just happened, I found that that really didn't work either.  Instead of building my business, most of my time was spent with lots of sleepless nights Netflixing, and, doing what I needed to do to keep things afloat, but that was about it.  Which in turn, made me feel even worse.  I knew that I was failing others.  I knew I needed to pull myself up, but I didn't know how.  It was so difficult and I felt very ashamed.

Rising Up....
I picked this book up, because I wanted the title to be how I started over.  I knew that I needed to Rise Strong....and more than that, I WANTED to Rise Strong.

Little by little, and day by day, I am Rising Up.  I post in my blog.  I talk to my team.  I encourage my challengers.  I am not perfect...very far from it.  But, because of this book, lots of prayers, and wonderful family and friends I realize that there is Strength in sharing about that messy middle.  And, much like the quote above says, you need to feel your way back up.  You can't ignore you way back up, work your way back up, talk your way back up, you MUST feel it.  Don't deny yourself that.  When you do, you are denying yourself healing from that failure and truly learning from it.  Avoid the urge to ignore, be stoic, or grit your teeth through it.  

Share.  Be vulnerable.  Feel.

I think you will find, just as I have, that people welcome it.  They know that it takes strength.  And most importantly, you will truly Rise Strong.

Thanks for reading, friends.


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